trying meds

 today is wednesday

i took the ritalin prescribed to me for the first time last Thursday at 8am

it made my jaw go clenchy and made me very thirsty

it made the inside of my head feel like elsa's palace

so clean and quiet

i was exhausted by 3pm

i woke up on friday with what felt like lockjaw

i took it again yesterday, again at 8am

i had a meeting and struggled to get used to the sharp relief of the people I was speaking to

i kept wondering if i was acting weird

i was late for therapy because i got so into the conversation and time did that time jump thing it does

today i took it at 4 pm because the morning was filled with domestic errands and wanted to focus on work in the afternoon

i spent three hours cleaning out my almost full google storage space and emails - i got my inbox down from over 12 000 to just over 1 000

i did not get to the marking

is this how neurotypicals feel all the time?

it's no wonder they rule the world